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Debbie Ridpath Ohi reads, writes and illustrates for young people. Every few weeks, she shares new art, writing and resources; subscribe below. Browse the archives here.

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Wednesday
Mar251998

words for the '90s

So who watched the Oscars? I know Allison did. :-) I watched bits and pieces here and there. Did everyone agree with who won/lost? I've seen Titanic, The Full Monty, As Good As It Gets, but I still need to see Wag The Dog, Kundun and L.A. Confidential.


My current taste fave is malt bread. I ate half a loaf yesterday by myself, throughout the day. I'm a big fan of weird breads, by the way. It's been years since I've touched Wonder Bread.


Here are some New Words for the 90s:


    Blamestorming: Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline as
    missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.


    Chainsaw Consultant: An outside expert brought in to reduce the
    employee head count, leaving the top brass with clean hands.


    Cube Farm: An office filled with cubicles.


    Ego Surfing: Scanning the Net, databases, print media and so on, looking
    for references to one's own name.


    Idea Hamsters: People who always seem to have their idea
    generators running.


    Keyboard Plaque: The disgusting buildup of dirt and crud found on
    computer keyboards.


    Mouse Potato: The online, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.


    Ohnosecond: That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that
    you've just made a big mistake.


    Perot: To quit unexpectedly, as in "My cellular phone just
    perot'ed."


    Swiped Out: An ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless
    because the magnetic strip is worn away from extensive use.


    Alpha Geek - The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person
    in an office or work group. "Ask Larry, he's the alpha geek around
    here."


    Beepilepsy - The brief seizure people sometimes have when their beeper
    goes off (especially in vibrator mode). Characterized by physical
    spasms,
    goofy facial expressions and interruption of speech in mid-sentence.


    Irritainment - Entertainment and media spectacles that are annoying,
    but you find yourself unable to stop watching them. The O.J. trials were
    a prime example.


    Percussive Maintenance - The fine art of whacking an electronic device to
    get it to work again.


    Seagull Manager - A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, shits
    over everything and then leaves.


    Umfriend - A sexual relation of dubious standing. "This is uh..Dale,
    my...um...friend..."


    Uninstalled - Euphemism for being fired. Heard on the voicemail of a
    vice president at a downsizing computer firm: "You have reached the
    number of an uninstalled vice president. Please dial our main number
    and ask the operator for assistance." See also Decruitment.


    Vulcan Nerve Pinch - The taxing hand position required to reach a
    the appropriate keys for certain commands. For instance, the warm
    re-boot for a Mac II computer involves simultaneously pressing the
    Control key, the Command key, the Return key and the Power On key.


    Yuppie Food Stamps - The ubiquitous $20 bills spewed out of ATM's
    everywhere. Often used when trying to split the bill after a meal:
    "We all owe $8 each, but all anybody's got is yuppie food stamps."

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